The well

Leering
at the
Dreary
London fog
or could be
sittng
on the
Oakland Bay
seeing
the San Francisco fog,
never the less
OLD World or NEW
the low flying
Clouds
are drifting
Away
Showing
the HORIZON
of a
clear, blue, day.
sorrow for man
anger for GOD
anger towards man
pleas to GOD
petition
for
remission
of
mine and your
SIN
seems to go unheard,
When standing
on the bottom
of a wishing well
picking up spare
change
to drop
right back in
fuddling
around
in the muddle
of a dream like
state,
wondering about
the state
OF THE GREAT STATE
asking the Lord God
Lord is it too late?
If ten could save the fate
of Sodom and Gomorah
how many for the good ole' U.S.A.
under God?
but
seperate from the church?
and
rising high to the sun
on the wax paper wings of science
free to be I
but must conform
for the unity
of community
free to be we,but
::::::::::
race,
class,
sex,
Keeps us in a place
I am American!
You are (something) American!
Can we just be American?
Being human has been lost,
in the rustle
and
bustle
of meaningless and empty
shallow space
MY
sorrow for the seperation
of men
from God
MY
anger at the world of men,
MY
anger at men
is my seperation from God.
sniffle
sigh
sniffle
AARRHHGGGGG
a vicous cycle
sad is anger
anger is sad
boys don't cry!
Sometimes, men do.
Forgiveness
brings tears of happiness
laughter for joy
My
smile on my lips
Is truly
ME
Smiling on the outside and N
because a sin
of mine
has been washed away
by another sip
of water
while
sitting
at
the well

The End?

ma,
ma,
Ma,
MA!
mom,
Mom,
MOM,
MOMA,
"what?"
MOMA
"what?"
What is?
"What is what?"
mmm
mmmm
mmmmm
"What! I'm watching T.V."
chute, always with the T.V.
This word ma,
Arrrr
arrrrma
armago
"Where you reading that from?"
the bible ma.
"Where?"
In the last part ma.
"Say it again."
armagoood
"Oh, thats armagedon, a big battle?"
Like War World II
"Much bigger."
How is it bigger than that War?
"That is the last war to be fought"
Is America gonna be fighting?
"yes"
"Who are we gonna be fighting?"
"It is the last battle between good and evil"
Who is else is gonna be fighting?
"Everyone."
me too.
"You too"
When is the war suppossed to start?
"Its going on right now."
I'm not big enough ma.
"Me and your Father are gonna keep you safe."
I want to fight against evil too ma.
"You will, at the end."

Changing name of blog.

Today, August 10th 2010. I have changed the name of my blog. I have come to the conclusion that I am not on a road less travelled, but one that is well paved and has some bright lanterns. All of remain thirsty, but having a claim in the well has a easier means to eleviate the thirst.

Valley Death

I am in shock and awe at the things I see. We live in this age of science and information but I see the things of the occult happening around me. The things in the bible that are evil I see them blatantly preformed. People trying to impose there wills on each other, magic, witch craft, and unbelief in God. Innocent lives lead astry to be the servant of a sick and twisted master. Give me the Yoke of Christ always. I am in the middle of a storm but I fear no evil for the Lord is my savior. Is this stuff for real? It has no power over me but does it have power over those that don't have the strength from Christ. I keep myself girded. I am learning this stuff has no power over me but it is very irritating and can weaken vigilance. Into the wilderness I am. I see fields ripe for harvest or is it fields for planting. Christ's Angels and satan's demons are in the fields. There is an absence of the word of God from people in the wilderness and they crave God but our systems has lead them to seek good in evil. Allowing evil to run a muck. My friend tells me that God is perfecting my heart for some purpose. I tell him what I have seen he accepts but does not truly believe because like me he is a son of science, but he wants to know. It is not something someone would want to know if they knew what they would find out. Angels and Demons are very real and the things in between. School teaches us enough to blind us to the reality of the unseen world. I have no solution for this situation except to take communion and pray. We are speaking of the Love of Christ in this malestorm. I have no idea what it is doing. I have faith as a son of Christ but as a son of science I would not believe if not for the grace of GOD. There are days when I doubt I can help anything. It will take judgement day to clean up this mess on earth, but I can only rely on my faith in these times of doubt that every little bit helps. I am done for now. The narrow path is on the wide path that is why we need deliverance from evil and guidance.

Homosexuality.

Can be viewed as a genetic anamoly, that tells us that our society is not in accordance with God. The problem is that I see our society has persecuted homosexual behavior instead of re-evaluating the conditions of socitety that has lead to increase homosexuality. I can not get this scripture of of my head:

Romans 1-25; Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshiped and served the creature more than the creator, who is blessed for ever. Amen 26. For this cause God gave them up to vile afflection: for even their women did change the natural use into that is against nature: 27 And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another, mene with men working that which is unseemly, and recieving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.

I have no better term at the time than genetic anamoly, but that sounds harsh in my ears, like they are a defect. The dumb thing to do is to treat them like a cancer or pack them in away in a closet. Even my use of "them" I find disheartening. I have homosexual friends that are very spiritual but have turned away from traditional forms of worship. I can not blame them I have been ill with organized religion. However, at this point of time I have a religion that strenghend my spirituality.

I think there is the homosexual and the learned behavior of homosesxuality. The treatment of homosexuality can be compared to cancer. The method has been supress/kill the homosexuals you prevent the spread of the diasease into society. The diasease goes into remission "back in the Closet" but, not changing society it returns bigger and badder. To compare homosexuality to cancer is a weak and bad comparision. I can only compare homosexuals to other humans. In my, understanding, there are alot of heterosexuals engaing in behavior that I see just as bad as a behavior trait found in the homosexual community "sleeping around," Sticks and stones! log jams in eyes, pin the tail on the donkey.

The part I want to focus on is verse 1 romans 25: To worship the creature more than the creator = God. The creature in this instance is the state. I like to believe the United State was formed to help bring about about Heaven on Earth. There is no doubt in the world that the United States is a Christian nation. As a child I thought: GOD, Family, Country. At times the relative importance was different. When I wanted a bag of army men Family was more a priorty than God. I think our ancestors where tired of the concept of give to ceasar what is ceasar give to God what is God, make a state in the name of God: The United States.

The day I heard a petition in the courts system of the United States is called a prayer, this was idolatry at its greatest. An arm of the state/beast/leviathan is answering prayers of the people. I have no idea when this was begun but I knew when I found out: I thought the creature has become God. My country the United States has been fighting to be a nation of God but is that the proper way. I read St. Augustine "City of God" and he said christians really had nothing to worry about when the city of Rome fell. The Christians did not concern themselves with possessions. In our fight to make this nation we have gotten stuff. We want to keep this stuff. We serve the state to keep our stuff,.

The stuff I love is not tangible: I Corinthians Chapter 12. There is a list of gifts that I will summarize: 1) word of wisdom, 2) word of knowledge, 3) faith, 4) healing, 5) miracles, 6) prophecy, 7) discerning spirits, 8) divers tounges, etc.

However, not all of us serve the state to keep stuff. Serving the State in the name of God helps the state, a whip on the beast. There is an ebb and flow between piety and impiety that I see in the Old testament and in western civilization. For example, Socrates was executed by the state for impiety. As a Christian that does not see paganism as valid I made the assumption he was killed for nothing, even to pagans to offend a God is a grave mistake.

When the state is inline with God I have no problem, when the state is not inline with God I have a problem. Trying to wrestle with a beast is absurd, but I wrestle with the beast because of the things I see around me. Homosexuality is everywhere in large cities. Are homosexuals a form of prophets that embody the fact that my nation is against God. How do I change myself for the benefit of the others. That is the will of the trinity. I am praying on it, along with alot of other things. I know with out the state i would not have my education, so I must do something for the state. Hopefully, I do self for God and others, that is what I pray for to be a good neighbor.

Freedom from Fear

The biggest fear an individual has to deal with is impermanence. We live in a constant changing world and nobody knows what to expect next. We desire something permanent to alleviate the fear. For instance, in Western civilization, our ancestors has generated a concept known as private property. Many focus on the aquisition of things, to have things that seem permanent creates an illusion of having permanence. I buy this house, therefore, I have a permanent residence. When old age settles in and the kids think you are just not safe enough living on your own, the house is sold and you get packed off to a board and care facility, while the excess wealth is used to buy the kids security from the fear of impermanence. They have a nice condo in a popular area, and I have pokers players to remembers the good ole days.

Lack of job security is another one of those fears we have. I am constantly trying to upgrade my skills. I do not upgrade them for a job, they help, but I look more for knowledge. Knowledge can evolve into wisdom or lessen to have a good paying job, to lessen the fear of impermanence. "The one who dies with the most toys wins." Our toys can not go with us to the afterlife. The ancient Pharoahs of Egypt built massive monuments to be remembered by humanity and hold their money for a trip to the afterlife. The only trip they are making is to another museum to be gawked at by little kids on a day trip away from school. The leaders of great civilization reduced to a pile of decaying clothes and bones with the chance of having a buger from little Johnny added to their wealth.

How does one find freedom from fear? That does not mean waiting to die and go to heaven, but to experience heaven now on earth. I read the bible to confirm my understanding of freedom from fear, but there are still those things that go "bump in the night" that causes me to have fear. One thing that I found interesting, but have not looked deeply into the concept, is the rise of demonic figures in Western Christian Religious art. Has hell been rising with the growth of Christianity? Weeds and Wheat growing together waitng for Christ to return. A person can say my faith in Christ is an illusion. It is difficult in this age of science to describe my peace of mind, it is an idea/spirit that can not be understood with physics.

I just don't get.

Daily I desire understanding for the things that I read in the word of God. Sometimes I get answers. Other times, I am left stting on a dock loking at the deep but only seeing my reflection. A case in point, that I have been struggling to come to grips with for over a decade: Luke 16 v 8. And the lord commended the unjust stewrd, because he had done wisely: for the children of of this world are in their generation wiser than the children of light. 9. And I say to you, Make yourselves friends of the mamon of unrighteousness; that, when you fail, they may recieve you into everlasting habitations. 10. He that is faithful in that whch is least is faithful also in much: and he that is unjust in the least is unjust also in much. 11. If therfore you have not been faithful in the unrighteous mammon, who will commit to your trust the true riches? 12. And if you have not been faithful in that which is another man's who shall give you that which is your own? 13. No servenat can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.

Who is Christ talking to? Maybe, I should get a modern King James version, but that will undermine my concept that the Holy Spirit will bring understanding in due time. I need to bring this up with another Christian that is a voice of the Holy Spirit. I believe that I am a child of light living in a capitalist economic system. I hate the aquisition of wealth. Everytime, I have tried to engage in the aquisition of wealth I have a short circuit. Literally, a short circuit, It goes against my belief. Living for money is bad. I try to get rid of it as soon as I get it to charity. I will live with a cup in my hand rather than the riches of the world. Thanks to God I am being shown a way for myself. I can not serve unrighteous mammon, is was not put into me to seek money, but to seek the kingdom of Heaven.

I think someone born in a Christian family is a child of light. The word of God is put into them like milk. At least, in my prespective. The first simple lesson I learned is that "money is the root of all evil." Today, I have modified to mean the violation of the tenth commandment to covet the neighbors things leads to evil and to protect the things that was achieved due to coveting leads to evil. It has been so extreme for me over the years that I would give all my things away and start over. Actually, I can still walk away from any property that I have.

Up their it says a ton of things that really confuses me. Am I disobeying the words of Christ not making money unrighteously. Am I to make this ill gotten money and use it for good causes. Is there where indulgences come from? I think a child of light will stay a child of light and those that are not will go to them and help those that do not have. A person not raised in the house of the lord and lived for money will see the errors of there ways and use there money wisely for God not for selfishness. On the other hand, a child of light would not go get unrighteous money. These are the delima's that keep me occupied and I search for meaning. There are days when I think I have it, but then it slips away.

For instance, Carl von Clausewitz in his book "On War" to a point, describes the civilian population role during war. The civilian population provides the neccessary resources for a country to engage in effective warfare to bring about political goals. The money generated by a civilian goes to the government which then can use the accumulated wealth to engage in warfare. In today's society every penney earned and spent goes into the coffers of the government. I believe all government are beast, or leviathan as coined by Thomas Hobbes. The early Christian representation for the Leviathan was Ceasar, for Hobbes was the King of England and today for me the United States of America.

First and foremost, I believe in limited government, but I have come to the conclusion there is no such thing as a limited government. Since the time of Christ, Christian have set out to create there own communities. Saint Augustine wrote a book concerning "The City of God." Early Christain settlers came to American to build a city shinning (the light of christ) on a hill. There is no where to go. The Word of God has gone around the world.

To have a city, implies a government. To have a government, implies having a beast, and that beast become unmanagable over time. The more powerful the beast becomes the less an individual has to combat the beast either with reason or force, to a point whree no one can combat the beast, because the beast controls what we see and learn. We have this concepts of freedom of press to present the masses with information to prehaps bring about change but it does not. The beast controls the media, not directly but by those that try to serve two masters, preserving themselves and the state that preserves them.

To control a state one controls the purse strings of a state. Today, the United State economy is no longer in the hands of the American people. The money I earn is going into the coffers of foriegn governments that do not share my and many Americans beliefs. For instance, China gets a large amount of tax dollars from the American people. Therefore, I am donating money to prop up a communist country that does not believe in the dominance of God, but men. I am contributiong to my own demise by buying a newspaper to learn about the death of my ideas and beliefs. I see all wealth is unrighteous mammon to feed a mammoth.

I wonder why Christians where crucified in the begining. Did they take the money out of the grasp of Ceasar. His vast armies began to shrink from lack of wealth and man power. Ceasars beast dies only to create another beast the Catholic Church. An up and down roller coaster to evolve into the states we have today. We live in the bellies of beasts and should I be satisfied my predicament.

Education is a method I promote, but what is being taught and why does the state cut back on education. I just don't get it. Forgiveness is the first step, for we do not know what we do.