I just don't get.

Daily I desire understanding for the things that I read in the word of God. Sometimes I get answers. Other times, I am left stting on a dock loking at the deep but only seeing my reflection. A case in point, that I have been struggling to come to grips with for over a decade: Luke 16 v 8. And the lord commended the unjust stewrd, because he had done wisely: for the children of of this world are in their generation wiser than the children of light. 9. And I say to you, Make yourselves friends of the mamon of unrighteousness; that, when you fail, they may recieve you into everlasting habitations. 10. He that is faithful in that whch is least is faithful also in much: and he that is unjust in the least is unjust also in much. 11. If therfore you have not been faithful in the unrighteous mammon, who will commit to your trust the true riches? 12. And if you have not been faithful in that which is another man's who shall give you that which is your own? 13. No servenat can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.

Who is Christ talking to? Maybe, I should get a modern King James version, but that will undermine my concept that the Holy Spirit will bring understanding in due time. I need to bring this up with another Christian that is a voice of the Holy Spirit. I believe that I am a child of light living in a capitalist economic system. I hate the aquisition of wealth. Everytime, I have tried to engage in the aquisition of wealth I have a short circuit. Literally, a short circuit, It goes against my belief. Living for money is bad. I try to get rid of it as soon as I get it to charity. I will live with a cup in my hand rather than the riches of the world. Thanks to God I am being shown a way for myself. I can not serve unrighteous mammon, is was not put into me to seek money, but to seek the kingdom of Heaven.

I think someone born in a Christian family is a child of light. The word of God is put into them like milk. At least, in my prespective. The first simple lesson I learned is that "money is the root of all evil." Today, I have modified to mean the violation of the tenth commandment to covet the neighbors things leads to evil and to protect the things that was achieved due to coveting leads to evil. It has been so extreme for me over the years that I would give all my things away and start over. Actually, I can still walk away from any property that I have.

Up their it says a ton of things that really confuses me. Am I disobeying the words of Christ not making money unrighteously. Am I to make this ill gotten money and use it for good causes. Is there where indulgences come from? I think a child of light will stay a child of light and those that are not will go to them and help those that do not have. A person not raised in the house of the lord and lived for money will see the errors of there ways and use there money wisely for God not for selfishness. On the other hand, a child of light would not go get unrighteous money. These are the delima's that keep me occupied and I search for meaning. There are days when I think I have it, but then it slips away.

For instance, Carl von Clausewitz in his book "On War" to a point, describes the civilian population role during war. The civilian population provides the neccessary resources for a country to engage in effective warfare to bring about political goals. The money generated by a civilian goes to the government which then can use the accumulated wealth to engage in warfare. In today's society every penney earned and spent goes into the coffers of the government. I believe all government are beast, or leviathan as coined by Thomas Hobbes. The early Christian representation for the Leviathan was Ceasar, for Hobbes was the King of England and today for me the United States of America.

First and foremost, I believe in limited government, but I have come to the conclusion there is no such thing as a limited government. Since the time of Christ, Christian have set out to create there own communities. Saint Augustine wrote a book concerning "The City of God." Early Christain settlers came to American to build a city shinning (the light of christ) on a hill. There is no where to go. The Word of God has gone around the world.

To have a city, implies a government. To have a government, implies having a beast, and that beast become unmanagable over time. The more powerful the beast becomes the less an individual has to combat the beast either with reason or force, to a point whree no one can combat the beast, because the beast controls what we see and learn. We have this concepts of freedom of press to present the masses with information to prehaps bring about change but it does not. The beast controls the media, not directly but by those that try to serve two masters, preserving themselves and the state that preserves them.

To control a state one controls the purse strings of a state. Today, the United State economy is no longer in the hands of the American people. The money I earn is going into the coffers of foriegn governments that do not share my and many Americans beliefs. For instance, China gets a large amount of tax dollars from the American people. Therefore, I am donating money to prop up a communist country that does not believe in the dominance of God, but men. I am contributiong to my own demise by buying a newspaper to learn about the death of my ideas and beliefs. I see all wealth is unrighteous mammon to feed a mammoth.

I wonder why Christians where crucified in the begining. Did they take the money out of the grasp of Ceasar. His vast armies began to shrink from lack of wealth and man power. Ceasars beast dies only to create another beast the Catholic Church. An up and down roller coaster to evolve into the states we have today. We live in the bellies of beasts and should I be satisfied my predicament.

Education is a method I promote, but what is being taught and why does the state cut back on education. I just don't get it. Forgiveness is the first step, for we do not know what we do.